Subject: Why not chase windmills? (Was Re: Why not concentrate on child molesters?)

From: [email-masked] (aaron.l.hoffmeyer)
Date: Fri, 2 Apr 1993 06:07:45 GMT

In article <[email-masked]> [email-masked] (Xavier Gallagher) writes:
>4. St Paul was a Jew, he brought to Christianity many of the Jewish
>   beliefs.  If you check out what he says you will find that it is
>   1% Jesus, 70% Judaism, 29% original (prejudiced) Bullshit.

Ah, yes.... the Epistles, like I Corinthians ... where Paul states his
convictions that Christ will come again very soon (this was about A.D.
50)(OK, so he waited 1943 years and he came back in Waco, Texas, Paul
was close, right?), and therefore, people should remain unmarried so
that they may devote more attention to religious endeavors.... He
seemed to have quite an affinity for the Big Sleep too -- personal
immortality and all ... "O death, where is thy sting?  O grave, where
is thy victory?"

One of the more interesting things I've read in the last year was a
short summary of all the books of the Bible from an objective, academic
perspective.  What are the books of the Bible about?  Many people could
probably give a general description of Psalms, Proverbs, Genesis, Job,
Exodus, Jonah, Revelations.  Fanatics could possibly accurately
describe the general contents of Deuteronomy, Judges, Kings, Ruth
'Intreat me not to Leave Thee', The Gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke,
John).  Many Jews could tell you about what a Mati Hariesque heroine
(aka "babe") Judith was for slicing Holofernes' (the evil
Assyrian's)(it sounds so, oh, so Big Time Wrestlingesque) throat -- to
the bone and beyond.  But who among you could summarize Amos, Esdras,
Maccabees, Hosea, Nehemiah or Habakkuk?

For example... Joshua:

A historical book dealing with Joshua's (John Derek's) assuming
leadership of the Hebrews after the death of Moses.  It tells of the
entry into Canaan and of battles (many, many battles) against hostile
tribes (yeah, right, hostile ... these folks were just sitting there
minding their own business when the next thing they know, the twelve
tribes of Israel (Hebrews) are breathing down their village, looking to
overrun them ... yeah, right, hostile ... one particular incident
stands out ... an attack was ordered on a village because several
messengers were publicly humiliated when they entered a village.  They
had their faces shaved and their hair cut.  "Joshua, they made fun of
us."  "Israelites!  Listen to me now and believe me later!  We must
avenge our brethren..." Joshua and his army of Hebrews killed hundreds
of villagers in retaliation.  All those who saw the light of the one
true God were spared (all those who kissed their behinds).)  It is a
deliberate attempt to create a national military hero.  Its most famous
passages describe the fall of the walls of Jericho and the standing
still of the sun and the moon.

and ... The Revelation of St. John the Divine (dba Revelations) (c. A.D. 90):

This book was almost certainly written by some unidentified Ephesian
mystic instead of by the Apostle John, to whom it has been ascribed.  It
is addressed, in epistolary form, to the seven Churches in Asia.  Though
nominally a revelation of Jesus Christ, the book is more Hebraic than
Christian in tone and represents a continuation of the Jewish longing
for freedom from oppression -- the same longing found in many of the Old
Testament prophets and in the book of Daniel.  It was written soon after
widespread persecution of the Christians began under the Roman emperor
Domitian.  This apocalypse foretells the fall of Rome (the Whore of
Babylon), the Second Coming of Christ, the resurrection of the saints,
the chaining of Satan, the Millenium, the final battle (of Armageddon)
between the powers of Good and Evil -- with the triumph of the former,
the Judgement Day, and the establishment of New Jerusalem.

Ethically inferior to the other books of the New Testament, the
Revelation is, nevertheless, a literary masterpiece.  Its mystical
symbolism (though often obscure), its graphic accounts of the battle
between Good and Evil, and its terrifying picture of the end of the
world place it high in the realm of descriptive writing.

Trivia questions:  What is the Apocrypha?  What happened to the
Apocrypha around 1890?

Aaron L. Hoffmeyer (metaphysician, beer drinker "Nut Brown Ale")
[email-masked] 

Bonus question:  St. Augustine, born Aurelius Augustinus, later Bishop
of Hippo, theologian and philosopher, was born in A.D. 354 in the city
of Tagaste in what country?

Essay Question:  Was Catullus a thoroughly modern poet?  Explain why or
why not.

"A" for the Class Question:  What was Plato's affectionate nickname for
Sappho of Lesbos?

Next Lecture:  The North Germanic Eddas.  Ah, the Lays.

Next week:  Euripedes and Those Phoenician Women.

"Get Your Filthy Hands Off My DESERT!!!"
"What'd he say?"
<Atomic Bomb Explosion>
	- R. Waters

Today on Oprah:  David Koresh ...  Child Sex Abuser or God?  Join us as
we talk to two of his ex-wives.

Today on Oprah:  Richard Pryor ...  MS or AIDS?  Join us as we talk to
two of his ex-wives.