Trying to fill in my 2006 Census online has been frustrating. It is amazing that in this year, there are employable web programmers that write such bad software.

Where every important web application I use (online banking, federal tax return database(!)) is willing to at least tolerate Firefox and Linux, this one doesn’t. It has all the needed base function (Java, JavaScript, Flash, Spyware, Adware, SpamZombie2000), it just doesn’t have some particular kind of mystery juju that the web site indiscreetly sniffs for.

“Send email to their contact address!” you say? Ha ha, meagre earthling, unlike every other major web system, there is no email address posted, and I’m just too good looking to dial a toll-free number on the phone to talk to their robots.

“Are you sure you have everything installed?” Oh yes. When the super sekrit MSIE impersonator is activated, the web system’s Java applet even starts. Seconds later, this window appears, indicating a depressing imperative:

“Why don’t you look at the code to work around it?” Not a bad idea, except that every capillary in my eye popped, with a torrent of hot aortal blood rushing down my face, as soon as I hit the “open javascript console” menu option. The circulatory upset was caused by the 37 javascript bugs resulting from a single page. No, my days of building a delectable dish out of doggy doo are long gone, my friend. This is beyond repair.

It stinks. The census will just have to wait until they fix this. I am sorry, World, if my small act of civil disobedience causes you to have spasms of datalessness, but there are principles involved.