What is a good (?) father to do, with the children begging for a bonfire; the wife no longer threatening me with hours of readings about the putative dangers of wood smoke; with the weather cooperating? Have a backyard fire, of course, but don't just sit there. Nah, we talked and experimented the whole time.

• What is the first consideration when starting a fire? planning to put it out
• Why is a fire-starter "log" made from? wood dust, glue/oil-fuel
• What is that black goo building near a flame? probably carbon
• Can one scratch it off? yes!
• What is that oval shaped shiny region on the pine board in the fire? a knot, where resin was carried into a branch
• Why is the side of the pine board away from the fire core warmer in the knot area than elsewhere? probably because of the resin on the fire side heating, liquifying and flowing outward
• Why do flames shoot out faster from a big fire? hotter, so air moves faster
• Why should you not put further kindling on a developed fire? because it might light on fire and then float off
• What are those little flying sparks? small pieces of burning or recently burned fuel
• Why does fire have a sound? because of the air & gases moving, flowing, mixing
• Why does the metal firepit not melt? because these flames/objects-on-fire, at around 800 degC, are not hot enough to melt steel
• How to use a dry powder type fire extinguisher? follow simple instructions, practice!
• How does that dry power smell/taste? pretty awful
• What do we feel on our palms when we turn it facing the fire, but not when we turn it sideways? infrared light
• Why can't we see infrared light? our eyes just don't have the right sensors for it
• Can one make an infrared shadow? yes, put one hand behind the other, both facing the fire
• Can one reflect infrared light? we didn't get a mirror to test that tonight (but yes)
• What happens if we cover up a fire? it will go out
• Why does the smoke from a freshly smothered fire look/smell different? because it has chemicals/vapours in it that would have burned
• What happens if we uncover a recently smothered fire? it may come back to life
• Is the fire-pit smothering lid hot enough to cook eggs? yes!

We still home-school the brats, so we try not to waste any opportunity to fill their heads with some knowledge. But rarely is it this much fun and this outright sciency, in just half an hour.

If you are a friend, and you've studied microbiology, and you neglected to tell me how miraculous these little machines that we are all made of are, I hereby serve notice that I hate you. Yes, I hate you for letting me spend so many years of an otherwise technically-inclined life, and never pointing out "Frank, you really should look into this". All the years I wasted spent looking at cute kitties on youtube should have been used in learning about protein synthesis and mitosis and histones and so on and so on. It's that awesome.